MEASURING

How do you measure progression? I feel Im growin as a person maturing but feel unstable paid dues not nearly enough in some eyes pride put to the side Im not seein sucession rise, inspite of a healthier mind Im still not the person I wanna be- I think to myself if I died today how would I be remembered your thoughts/ opinions Ill take in stride/ Ive come  a ways from the young dude I used to be truthfully I smile proud of who Iam now- but self gradification not payin the bills Im livin week to week expectin Gods favor and tryin to live right under enormous temptation, phases come and go thoughts on what to do- handle the job front or clear my mental internal peace I seek I speak with a head confused my views cloudin a sunny day Im waitin/ replayin convos Ive had in my past wonderin are the decisions Im maken right or am I  settin up for failure-pressure pointin in overdrive Lord guide me- help me make weaknesses strengths and strengths to become even stronger, I pray it everyday so many requests I try listenin to his words too swords drew Im fightin evil these battles come strong I CANT  lose I  long to/ prevail and tell my story generations to come- you read my poems  thats cool but actions speak louder Im proud of my faith its times like these I carry it most high I'll rise cant let times like these bury me, worry free peace of mind rewind time and again chasin success and self worth dodgin sin in between I keep my faith up high trust In you Lord I know you will always listen on them days that discourage me/